Posted: October 10th, 2011 by Michele Borba
Acclaimed author Trudy Ludwig’s new and sensitive book, Better than You, will prove a welcome resource for any parent, teacher, or counselor. It is also the perfect antidote for the troubling trend of kid arrogance. Jake’s story gives kids insight into what lies beneath the urge to brag and shows them how adopting a “better than you” attitude can break friendships rather than build them. I highly recommend this glorious read (and any other of Ludwig’s fabulous books!)
From my foreword of “Better than You” by Trudy Ludwig
REALITY CHECK: “In data from 37,000 college students, narcissistic personality traits rose just as fast as obesity from the 1980s to the present. The rise is accelerating, with scores rising faster in the 2000s than in previous decades.” – Jean Twenge, Ph.D., San Diego State University and author of The Narcissism Epidemic and Generation Me.
There’s a bad attitude spreading among kids these days and it’s got a name: arrogance. No child is born arrogant, yet more kids are bragging about their accomplishments and comparing their possessions and achievements to others’.
This disturbing trend, which I attribute in large part to our competitive, materialistic, and “praise-aholic” culture, is not only unbecoming, it also doesn’t lead to lasting friendships.
The good news is that kids can learn to curb their arrogance, and it’s up to the caring adults in their lives to show them how.
Don’t get me wrong: I’m not belittling any child’s talents or skills. This issue isn’t about what a kid can do or how he looks. It’s about his preoccupation with being center stage, making sure everyone knows just how great he is. And researchers report that this childhood need, if left unchecked, will remain a pattern in adulthood as well.
A child’s sense of self-worth should not be contingent upon earning approval and accolades from others. The best self-esteem is internalized, with the child gaining a sense of pride and inner confidence in accomplishing something for the simple joy of doing it on his own.
When parents ask me for advice on how to change their children’s boastful ways, I often recommend these key strategies:
Click here for practical strategies and the rest of the article: The Kid Arrogance Cure | Dr. Michele Borba’s Reality Check.
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